How Do I Know If They're a Keeper?

How Do I Know If They’re a Keeper?

At one time or another, everyone has asked themselves; where is this relationship or lack thereof relationship going? Literally, sitting there, wondering and contemplating, if the person across from me is the one I have been searching for. Could this be it? Could my search be over?

How do we know when we have met the one? Here are a few simple things to ask yourself to find out if they have what it takes to make the cut!

  • Do they have a life of their own outside of work? If not, chances are, you are not going to have a lot to talk about and life together will get boring or clingy very quickly! Think long and hard about what life would be like long term if you have your own interests and the person you are dating has nothing besides work to do or discuss.

  • What things do you have in common? Do you love to travel and they hate leaving the city? Do they want kids and you dread ever having to be left alone with a child that isn’t yours, much less one of your own? These are things that make or break a relationship, so ask early what they want out of life and see if you are on the same page. Don’t assume everyone wants the life you do.

  • What do you value? Do you value the same things? Do you value friends and family and they value money and work? If you don’t share the same values, you will have to ask yourself if your needs will be met and if you will be forced to compromise yourself to be with this person long term.

  • Are you sexually compatible? Often, we forget that chemistry is essential and if we don’t feel that attraction to the person we are dating in the beginning, chances are, those feelings are not going to magically appear as time goes on. Do you feel lust for the person or is your attraction more friendship based and you are not interested in them sexually? If you don’t have those feelings, I would say you are best off as friends and to keep on searching for the person that has that type of chemistry.

  • Lastly, if you have doubts, go with your intuition. So often we doubt ourselves and waste so much time, money and energy on someone who wasn’t worth any of those things from the get-go. Don’t feel bad for saying this isn’t a good fit. Be happy you were in tune with what your instincts said. Be happy that you were not willing to settle and keep going! On to the next!

For more dating coaching advice and help, please visit www.thequeenofdating.com

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